As children grow, they will face many transitions both big and small. These changes are a normal part of development but they can also cause uncertainty and anxiety. As parents and carers, we play a key role in guiding and reassuring children during these times of adjustment. With preparation, communication, and support, we can help make transitions smoother.
Talk Openly About the Upcoming Change
When a major change is on the horizon, children need time to process and accept the transition. Talking through what will happen removes the mystery and gives them a sense of control. Be sure to discuss:
- The reasons for the change
- Exactly what will be different and what will stay the same
- Any new routines or practices to expect
- Their feelings and concerns about the change
Keep Communication Open
Check in frequently about how your child is feeling leading up to and after the change occurs. Encourage them to express any worries and ask questions. Remaining open and honest will provide ongoing reassurance.
Involve Them in Practical Preparations
Allow children to actively participate in getting ready for the transition where possible. For example, have them pack their own bag and select favoured items if you are moving or going on a trip. Practical preparations help build competence and optimism about the change.
Stick to Established Routines
Try to maintain familiar routines like bedtime, mealtimes, playtime, etc. Keep scheduled activities like sports or playdates in place as well. Consistent structure and predictability help children feel secure when other parts of their lives are in flux.
Acknowledge and Validate Their Feelings
Change can trigger difficult emotions like sadness, fear, or nervousness. Validate what children are feeling through words and affection. Say things like “It’s okay to feel nervous about starting at a new school. Many kids feel that way.” Provide plenty of hugs, empathy and listening to help them process their emotions. Remind them it is normal to feel this way during transitions.
Create Consistency Where Possible
If the change involves a new environment, bring familiar items like bedding, favourite toys and family photos to help it feel homier. Keep preferred foods and mealtime routines the same. The more consistency you can create, the more secure children will feel.
Practice Key Skills
If certain abilities will be important in the new environment or routine, provide opportunities to practice those skills. For example, a child starting school could practice getting changed for PE.
Maintain Support Systems
Keep children connected to existing support systems like current friends, extended family and community resources. This provides continuity and a sounding board during the adjustment period for major changes and transitions such as going to a new short-term fostering placement.
Embrace a Growth Mindset
View the transition as an exciting opportunity for learning and development. Children will feed off your positive attitude and be more optimistic themselves.
The more we can prepare, communicate with, and validate our children, the better able they will be to handle major changes and transitions. With our support, they can emerge confident, resilient, and primed for success.